VII. For the Last Time

I visit my love once more
Upon my return
I once again feel uncertain

It’s a strange thing
this gift
It’s endearing
Our relationship lives
much like any other
Existing with its own idiosyncrasies
Its own characteristics
It’s as unique as we are

I’m left with limited capacity
I realize I won’t have any memory
of the first time he meets me
This is unlike the other times
the ring had shown me
memories of mine yet to be made
This isn’t the same
I don’t survive this day

I know there’s a way
There always has been
but I feel so overwhelmed
with the destiny that lies ahead of me
The responsibility
Yet another riddle to be deciphered
I just don’t want to be confused
I don’t want to lose him
I don’t want to die
I can’t help myself
to do anything else
aside from lay my head down and cry

As I feel
I have no more tears to release
I lift my head
to find myself back
in the lush landscape again
I’m at the edge of the healing spring
that I watched the unicorn bathe in
Feeling a bit better
I dip my hand in to play with the water
only to see some substance
flow from the ring
Seeping into the healing spring

I watch in amazement
as the image of my beloved forms on the surface
An apparition in the water
He smiles at me
and to my disbelief
he reaches out his hand
to hold mine
In an instant
we’re in another place and time
where I’m cradling an old, dying woman
in my arms
The moment passes
He’s holding my hand again
before his hand becomes viscous
turning back into liquid
It returns to the spring
causing ripples to distort his image
which becomes a substance
seeping back into the ring

In hindsight
I was foolish to think
that it could only be my memories
stored within these stones

There is indeed a memory
of that moment in time
but it’s his recollection of events
not mine
I’ll last as long as fate permits
but I cannot survive in a time
where I do not exist
That’s fine
It’s okay

The sun will rise for him
marking the dawn of a new day
while at the same time it sets on me
as I fade away

It’s funny
Because he was older
Because he knew more about us
Because he introduced me
to this new life
I believed
he had all the answers
Now that it’s been me
Now that I’m the one
who is older
Now that I’m the one
who introduced him
to this new life
I can see
that he was still learning
Just like me
Just as I was

As I approach my final moments
I understand
The journey never ends
It only transitions
Like an immortal soul

Life is a long road
filled with diversion and detours
As we travel
we often reminisce in reverie
about our most cherished memories
Of the little pieces of heaven
we’ve collected along the way
It’s a journey that will always end
will always begin again
and will always be worth traveling

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Beginning again